Me: "What makes you think I would?"
Friend: "You damn act one what."
Upon hearing her reply, I was momentarily stunned.
I just went "woah, woah :O"
Is this really the kind of vibe I give other people? Haha I personally don't see that as an insult and I'm pretty sure my friend knows my character well enough to know I would not take her remark to heart. But what she said does compel me to look at the bigger picture about social media and social perceptions, which I will elaborate on shortly.
On Monday morning, after giving my eyes a rough rub, I did the typical thing many of us will when we wake up - check for social media updates with our phones. My heart sank a little when I first saw successive posts on the change in my friends' profile picture to Mr Lee Kuan Yew's portrait. Then I was greeted by the somber news that he had passed away. To be honest, I did consider the idea of changing my profile picture too. But I figured that is not my style of showing respect for a great leader so I should not do so rashly and blindly. I prefer to express and keep my grief and appreciation within the confines of my private space, which is here.
I was born a Malaysian and I spent the first few years of my childhood in the Kampong under the care of my great grandmother and a few relatives. I then moved to Singapore, to the embrace of my parents who have been settling down here. Today, I am a proud Singaporean who have received many benefits from the visionary policies implemented by the founding government, especially bilingualism and biculturalism. Thank you Mr Lee, for being one of the architects of modern Singapore, for enabling my family to reside in such a secure and comfortable environment.
These few days, social media has been flooded with tribute posts to Mr Lee. I read and liked every single one of it. Whether their captions are about Mr Lee's wise quotes, or appreciation for food, drinks and umbrellas kindly distributed by volunteers, or Malaysians grateful for the opportunities to study and live in Singapore, or the economy and safety we owe to Mr Lee, I can feel the sincerity and genuineness pouring out from their hearts in the crafting of my friends and acquaintances' posts. Everyone has a different story to tell based on their experiences, no matter how similar they sound. Henceforth, I feel rather disturbed when I see snide comments casting doubt on people's motives behind paying tribute for Mr Lee and sarcastic remarks like "Oh so everybody became an expert on Singapore's history overnight?" Who are they to claim that people are merely following the trend of posting tributes and queuing up to pay respects at the Parliament House? While everyone is entitled to their own opinions, it is disconcerting that they publish such disparaging comments online to purposefully provoke and disperse negative energy.
How do we begin to draw the line between freedom of speech and modesty in speech?
Personally, I do not subscribe to the belief that people only pay tributes to Mr lee on social media for the sake of keeping up with the trend. It is not as if we single out people who post their tributes and praise them for being a faithful citizen, and then condemn other people who do not publicly display the same kind of respect. Most of the posts are likely to be brushed away, scrolled away by skeptical Singaporeans anyway. So I actually do think that those tribute posts are not meant to prove to anyone about anything or earn likes from their followers, but rather for them to keep an account of their gratitude, for their own reference. Perhaps the more educated people are, the more cynical they become in their attempt to be discerning. There is no causal effect of education on cynicism, but there is a certain correlation.
Maybe I'm fortunate to have a social circle made up of genuine, down-to-earth people. So far, nobody has repulsed me with disgustingly unreal tributes.
Social media indeed has very heavy implications on our lives. Unspoken social media ethics guide our behaviours almost everyday. How we restrict ourselves to only post the nicest filtered photo so as to not "spam our followers", how we feel this picture is not good enough to go on our Instagram so we shall tweet about it instead, how we check who are our ardent likers, how we have to post at a certain timing of the day to get more likes... It gets very tiring, don't you think so? So tiring that a few people I know "go on a social media hiatus"occasionally.
When you "follow" people on social media platforms, their updates appear on your feed indiscriminately. Even if you are not really interested in keeping up with their lives, snippets of their life happenings are presented to you anyway. Which is why I'm starting to like this blog space more and more. People come here voluntarily to read about my life, as and when they feel like it. You guys are not obliged to like and comment. More often than not, we started following people we met on one occasion and then we never do get to cross paths with them again. But they continue to linger in our lives via Facebook and Instagram, albeit disconnected in the real life.
"These days, because of technology I presume, we seem to collect people more than anything else. And yet most of these people are mere strangers to us, and us to them. We are left with a fictional space in which we are nothing more than voyeurs in the lives of people we were only meant to know for a time."
Out of the 500 or more people you follow on Instagram, how many of them are still relevant in your lives? How many of them do you still see as your friend? I have a pretty strict definition of "friend". To me, a friend is someone whom I want to reach out to, to have proper conversations with, to care for, and to be there for in times of need. And it has to be mutual. Not necessarily in equal measure, but mutual understanding of these expectations. Classmates are not friends, OG mates are not friends, fellow committee members are not friends, if they do not fit the above definition. There are people whom I follow, that do not fall into the category of "friends" right from the start. For some, I have "unfollowed" them. But for the rest, I am still largely interested in learning about their updates, because of the impact they once had on my lives which has helped to shape who I am today. I want to know that they are doing well, and I wish for the best for them.
Social media is supposed to make keeping in touch more convenient, like helping us to keep track of our dear friends' well-being when we are too busy to sustain conversations with them privately. But it has evolved with time into an image/status enterprise, for people to present the sweetest, happiest parts of their lives, to "look good". One moment you see this couple posting sweet dedications to each other, the next moment you learn of their breakup, and you go like "HUH?!! Aren't they very happy together??" Yeah, we don't really see people posting sad stuff on social media. But when they do, some people start to question their intentions for doing so. "Is it they want sympathy?" "Aiya. Attention-seeking. They want people to care for them right." What's with all these negative thoughts about the people around us?
I'm not saying that social media is bad. It is how we use it that determines its quality to our lives. I myself use it very often to keep myself updated on the society I live in. But when we get caught up in the rat race, our personalities become pretty much diluted by these social media platforms, as said by one of my favourite bloggers. We are afraid to miss out on the latest happenings/gossips if we do not use social media, we desperately "have to" catch up with one another's lives, always looking for wifi spots when we go overseas.. Ultimately, we have to learn to find the balance. To know what is important to us and let go of the petty stuff. And also to have more empathy for the people around us, to have grace in our hearts.
Right now, I'm watching the state funeral live on youtube. It's remarkable that the rain has not deterred fellow Singaporeans from lining the road. Legacy is timeless. Rest In Peace, Mr Lee Kuan Yew. Always a great leader in my heart.
I just went "woah, woah :O"
Is this really the kind of vibe I give other people? Haha I personally don't see that as an insult and I'm pretty sure my friend knows my character well enough to know I would not take her remark to heart. But what she said does compel me to look at the bigger picture about social media and social perceptions, which I will elaborate on shortly.
On Monday morning, after giving my eyes a rough rub, I did the typical thing many of us will when we wake up - check for social media updates with our phones. My heart sank a little when I first saw successive posts on the change in my friends' profile picture to Mr Lee Kuan Yew's portrait. Then I was greeted by the somber news that he had passed away. To be honest, I did consider the idea of changing my profile picture too. But I figured that is not my style of showing respect for a great leader so I should not do so rashly and blindly. I prefer to express and keep my grief and appreciation within the confines of my private space, which is here.
I was born a Malaysian and I spent the first few years of my childhood in the Kampong under the care of my great grandmother and a few relatives. I then moved to Singapore, to the embrace of my parents who have been settling down here. Today, I am a proud Singaporean who have received many benefits from the visionary policies implemented by the founding government, especially bilingualism and biculturalism. Thank you Mr Lee, for being one of the architects of modern Singapore, for enabling my family to reside in such a secure and comfortable environment.
This was my attempt to draw our late founding father. I wanted to bring it with me when I went to queue at the Parliament House but I couldn't bring myself to do so...not good enough x_x My friend commented: "Aww chyi that's a nice gesture but why the face looks like pancake." And I realised the face is indeed very out of proportion. 2 A.M. work, I will improve next time!
Bought white lilies and gerberas.
Massively long queue, but not a single word of complaint was heard. Everyone behaved in an orderly fashion, awaiting their turn to reach Parliament House.
If possible, please enlarge this photo and take a closer look at the two sketches done by some children (!!)
These few days, social media has been flooded with tribute posts to Mr Lee. I read and liked every single one of it. Whether their captions are about Mr Lee's wise quotes, or appreciation for food, drinks and umbrellas kindly distributed by volunteers, or Malaysians grateful for the opportunities to study and live in Singapore, or the economy and safety we owe to Mr Lee, I can feel the sincerity and genuineness pouring out from their hearts in the crafting of my friends and acquaintances' posts. Everyone has a different story to tell based on their experiences, no matter how similar they sound. Henceforth, I feel rather disturbed when I see snide comments casting doubt on people's motives behind paying tribute for Mr Lee and sarcastic remarks like "Oh so everybody became an expert on Singapore's history overnight?" Who are they to claim that people are merely following the trend of posting tributes and queuing up to pay respects at the Parliament House? While everyone is entitled to their own opinions, it is disconcerting that they publish such disparaging comments online to purposefully provoke and disperse negative energy.
How do we begin to draw the line between freedom of speech and modesty in speech?
Personally, I do not subscribe to the belief that people only pay tributes to Mr lee on social media for the sake of keeping up with the trend. It is not as if we single out people who post their tributes and praise them for being a faithful citizen, and then condemn other people who do not publicly display the same kind of respect. Most of the posts are likely to be brushed away, scrolled away by skeptical Singaporeans anyway. So I actually do think that those tribute posts are not meant to prove to anyone about anything or earn likes from their followers, but rather for them to keep an account of their gratitude, for their own reference. Perhaps the more educated people are, the more cynical they become in their attempt to be discerning. There is no causal effect of education on cynicism, but there is a certain correlation.
Maybe I'm fortunate to have a social circle made up of genuine, down-to-earth people. So far, nobody has repulsed me with disgustingly unreal tributes.
Social media indeed has very heavy implications on our lives. Unspoken social media ethics guide our behaviours almost everyday. How we restrict ourselves to only post the nicest filtered photo so as to not "spam our followers", how we feel this picture is not good enough to go on our Instagram so we shall tweet about it instead, how we check who are our ardent likers, how we have to post at a certain timing of the day to get more likes... It gets very tiring, don't you think so? So tiring that a few people I know "go on a social media hiatus"occasionally.
When you "follow" people on social media platforms, their updates appear on your feed indiscriminately. Even if you are not really interested in keeping up with their lives, snippets of their life happenings are presented to you anyway. Which is why I'm starting to like this blog space more and more. People come here voluntarily to read about my life, as and when they feel like it. You guys are not obliged to like and comment. More often than not, we started following people we met on one occasion and then we never do get to cross paths with them again. But they continue to linger in our lives via Facebook and Instagram, albeit disconnected in the real life.
"These days, because of technology I presume, we seem to collect people more than anything else. And yet most of these people are mere strangers to us, and us to them. We are left with a fictional space in which we are nothing more than voyeurs in the lives of people we were only meant to know for a time."
Out of the 500 or more people you follow on Instagram, how many of them are still relevant in your lives? How many of them do you still see as your friend? I have a pretty strict definition of "friend". To me, a friend is someone whom I want to reach out to, to have proper conversations with, to care for, and to be there for in times of need. And it has to be mutual. Not necessarily in equal measure, but mutual understanding of these expectations. Classmates are not friends, OG mates are not friends, fellow committee members are not friends, if they do not fit the above definition. There are people whom I follow, that do not fall into the category of "friends" right from the start. For some, I have "unfollowed" them. But for the rest, I am still largely interested in learning about their updates, because of the impact they once had on my lives which has helped to shape who I am today. I want to know that they are doing well, and I wish for the best for them.
Social media is supposed to make keeping in touch more convenient, like helping us to keep track of our dear friends' well-being when we are too busy to sustain conversations with them privately. But it has evolved with time into an image/status enterprise, for people to present the sweetest, happiest parts of their lives, to "look good". One moment you see this couple posting sweet dedications to each other, the next moment you learn of their breakup, and you go like "HUH?!! Aren't they very happy together??" Yeah, we don't really see people posting sad stuff on social media. But when they do, some people start to question their intentions for doing so. "Is it they want sympathy?" "Aiya. Attention-seeking. They want people to care for them right." What's with all these negative thoughts about the people around us?
I'm not saying that social media is bad. It is how we use it that determines its quality to our lives. I myself use it very often to keep myself updated on the society I live in. But when we get caught up in the rat race, our personalities become pretty much diluted by these social media platforms, as said by one of my favourite bloggers. We are afraid to miss out on the latest happenings/gossips if we do not use social media, we desperately "have to" catch up with one another's lives, always looking for wifi spots when we go overseas.. Ultimately, we have to learn to find the balance. To know what is important to us and let go of the petty stuff. And also to have more empathy for the people around us, to have grace in our hearts.
Right now, I'm watching the state funeral live on youtube. It's remarkable that the rain has not deterred fellow Singaporeans from lining the road. Legacy is timeless. Rest In Peace, Mr Lee Kuan Yew. Always a great leader in my heart.
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